I had mixed feelings about coming here. I kinda felt like I was running away from the sadness at home. I was fortunate to receive another scholarship. It would have been wonderful if Gordon could have come with me but his energy was low and it would have been hard for him to get around. He knew this was a huge opportunity for me so Gordon agreed he would stay with his parents while I was away.

Every night when I got in I called home, but the three hour time difference made things difficult.Our hotel was out in a part of town where there wasn't much available. So most nights we ate in town and we would have to wait for the shuttle bus that didn't run very often. By the time I got talking to Gordon he would be groggy from pain medications.

I phoned Beth one night to see if kitty was behaving himself without us. She informed me that mom had to go to the hospital for more tests. She omitted that she was taken by ambulance and admitted with pneumonia. Sis didn't want me hopping on the next flight back to Ontario. She promised to keep me posted.

When I talked to Gordon I knew he wasn't doing well either. It was hard to be so far away and feeling helpless to do anything. Days later when I was talking to him, his spirits were up. He had seen the coverage of the conference talking about the new anti-viral drugs that were proving successful at keeping the virus at bay. He saw a glimmer of hope if not for himself, for me.

One day I joined the protest because of the fact that our Prime Minister did not show up at the conference. I was amazed at the anger and frustration of the activists to be heard. It was stressed that.... "The cure isn't here and we are a long way from a cure, both for the rich and poor, we are no closer than we were ten years ago!"

In the grand pavilion I sat in anticipation as the first speaker walked to the edge of the stage. Her words resonated around the room. "Being a 65 year old grandmother, people always want to know how my son and I were infected. IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!"

I will never forget those powerful words.We all jumped to our feet and gave her a roaring standing ovation! The feeling of unity envoloped the pavilion. I left there hoping that I would someday make such an impact.

This is one of the guiding principles of the conference, giving the perfect definition of why we were there. Solidarity; the answers to our many questions about preventing, managing, and curing AIDS lies in our ability to unite. In our willingness to accept differences and in the unwavering commitment of people and nations to one another.

CM